Olympic Live Sites in Hong Kong - Points to Note

Olympic Live Sites in Hong Kong - Points to Note:
1. All participants should follow the rules and regulations set by the Organiser and produce valid admission tickets when entering the Sites.

Heil!

2. For security reasons, the Organiser will inspect the personal belongings carried by any person entering the Sites.


Fair enough but what will they be looking for and how aptly trained will they be to recognize, presumably, the items specified below?

3. For public order and safety in the Sites, participants are prohibited from bringing the following items into the Sites:
* Flags, banners, slogans, leaflets, publicity materials and displays without the Organiser's prior approval;

Aha, they forgot to ban the bat signal! Oh, wait, is that a display? And no lighting the beacons of Gondor either.

* Any kind of article which can be used as a weapon or may be offensive; and

Ok, they got me there. I can't bring in a sawed-off shotgun, nerve gas, or my Basic Instinct DVDs...

* Any food, drinks, glassware or fragile articles which may pose a danger.

Will they stop me from bringing in my McNugget Meal from the Official Olympic Restaurant? Well it does contain food and drink and poses a really big danger of chronic heart disease, obesity...

4. Not to wear collectively, display or promote the trade mark appeared on the clothing and belongings intentionally for the purpose of commercial or political promotion of any kind;

What? You mean this old bald guy in orange robes on my T-Shirt is not Che Guevarra?

5. Not to conduct activities which hinder the smooth running of the Sites or other people's participation;

People will be watching the Olympic telecast on a big TV screen on their big fat asses. What activity hinders that? Ummm... exercise!

6. Not to sell or hire out any articles in the Sites or provide any articles for the purposes of selling or hiring out without authorization;

I have nothing funny for this one...

7. Not to distribute unauthorized printing materials or conduct political/commercial promotion;

So you will have to spell them T1bet, Ta1wan, Burm@ and D@rfur? Oh and my personal favorite, F@lun G0ng.

8. Not to perform any acts which will disturb the order of the Sites;

I'm having a problem with all these broad and sweeping regulations. Standing still or producing anti-bodies could fall under this.

9. Not to record, take photo or video-shoot programmes conducted at the Sites without authorization or done for non-private purpose.

But Mommy, I want a picture with that tank rolling over those silly people!

10. The operating hours of the Sites may change due to weather conditions. Please take note of the public announcement.

Because Hong Kong does not get the same weather control budget as Beijing...

11. Please go to the Sites by means of public transport as far as possible.

Well, I actually agree. Hong Kong public transport is one of the best in the world!